Each semester I give my undergrad communication law students a writing prompt about the burden of proof. I explain the concept of a preponderance of the evidence then ask them to develop analogies to show that something is greater than something else.
Here are some of the most entertaining of the responses:
• “Like rain boots on a sunny day, their evidence is irrelevant.”
• “The evidence he has presented is like a hippo on a tight rope. It is fun to watch but is not going to hold up for very long.”
• “Their proof and evidence is the quality of Jose Cuervo. My client’s proof and evidence is the quality of Patron.”
• “If you were to compare my argument with theirs, it would be like strong coffee versus watered down grounds.”
• “My evidence is as heavy as a fat kid on Thanksgiving, while your evidence is like a model during Fashion Week.”
• “We have just enough people to fit the maximum occupancy in an elevator. The other side has one lonely person.”
• “Their evidence is a slow clap. Mine is a standing ovation.”
• “The ball was just an inch out of bounds. Even if its just an inch, the ball still goes to the other team.”
• “It’s like being 30 seconds late to class. You’re almost on time, but you’re still late.”
• “Like a catapult, all the evidence we have presented has launched the defendant’s case out of here.”
• “When you weigh the evidence of my case and their case, there’s no competition. Their case is so constrained its like they’re in the sandbox and I’m at Zuma Beach.”
• “My evidence is Cinderella’s shoe—a perfect fit.”
• “My response is like Charmin toilet paper and theirs is the generic stuff you have to use at the gas station.”
Jon Pfeiffer is an experienced entertainment and copyright trial attorney practicing in Santa Monica. Jon is also an adjunct professor at Pepperdine University in Malibu, California where he teaches Media Law. COM 570 covers First Amendment issues as well as copyright, defamation and privacy.